I haven`t posted for a few days... why... I don`t really know. I`ve been feeling a little down and have no idea why. Mom went home a couple days ago, so I`ve been on my own. I`m finding it very hard getting enough protein, and sick of adding protein powder to everything. I`m finally allowed to have pureed food, so today I have to go shopping for some stuff. I can have poached eggs, and I`m going to make a lentil soup later today. It`s now become a chore to eat. I actually don`t feel like eating! I never thought I would ever say something like that.
I weighed myself this morning... I`m at 247lbs. It isn`t coming off as fast as I was expecting, but I guess every little bit I will take and enjoy. My problem now is trying to get out and start moving. My anxiety seems to be getting the better of me, and I have to seriously give it a kick in the ass. It will be a struggle to get ready today, but I`m determined to shower, straighten my hair and put make-up on. I`m losing weight and I should start feeling better about myself... so how come I don`t? When I get down to a normal weight... will I still feel fat and depressed? What`s wrong with my mind? When I have an UP day I`ll take it.