I have been blessed with finding out that I'm pregnant, whereas, I was always told that I would most likely never give birth to my own child - due to health issues. I'm currently 28 weeks pregnant, and having a hard time dealing with the issue of putting on weight. So far I'm at an even 200 Lbs, and terrified of putting more on. I had put on some weight, but then actually lost some. The early months of the pregnancy I had gone up over 210 Lbs, but somehow managed to drop 10 Lbs. Looking at myself in the mirror I'm supposed to see the pregnancy beauty - glow... I just see that I'm a huge hippo. My stomach looks huge, almost like when I was obese before. I hate my body... I feel so fat and ugly and uncomfortable. Nothing fits, and I can't exactly afford pregnancy clothes... which makes me wish I kept some of my old fat clothes from the past.
So that's where I'm at right now... my daily struggle to make sure that I eat healthy so that my little angel can grow, but at the same time trying to love myself even when I feel pregnant and fat. Today is a slight downer, but hopefully tomorrow I will be smiling.